Guest Post - Amy Mah


How did I create a vampire world?


Well, it all started when my publisher Nicholas Reardon of Reardon Publishing was looking for authors to write some paranormal novels, he wanted something funny to publish and wanted to use an as yet undiscovered author, and that is where I came in, Miss Mah to the rescue!
You would think creating a vampire world would be easy as everyone knows all about vampires and unlike doing a book on say a dryad, which apart from a numbering system is also a tree nymph in case you are interested. With a Dryad I could say she has six fingers on her left hand and likes to drink mead and very few people will shout and say no it is the right hand and she only drinks water,
But with vampires you have to see what has gone before you and then build on it, and that is what I did with my book: FANGS RULE a girls guide to being a vampire.
With vampires you do not have to tell anyone about the basics ……basics are .er…well……like ……….blood……sun light……coffins…holy symbols…….fangs …….. fancy cloaks …. And did I say blood? Yes? Well it is worth a second mention as BLOOD is what vampires are all about, as you read what people write about, things change our lovely long toothed friends can walk in sunlight, wear modern clothes, and even be a priest! Ok I know but it was in a very low budget film that I will not even name as it was ……..er………. crap ………So  lots of things can change but never the blood …….even if it now comes in bottles (True Blood).
Over the years I have read and seen lots of vampire books and films and some are so bad I wanted to go and bite the author or film director.
I once saw a film called the last vampire in New York that had the vampire walking about in the day light and shooting people instead of biting them………… if you have not seen it don’t bother,
………..I like films to have a plot and a reason for happening or they bore me, so when I have a world to create I try and step into it and take a look around ………… things have to happen for a reason …………. And always have logic to them no mater how odd the logic is …….. if someone can jump off a roof and land on the ground unharmed (Underworld) ther must be a reason and there must even be a reason for wearing long leather coats and is it the same as the cloaks in the past ……… the answer could be yes and in my world I can you give reasons.
So lets go back to BLOOD ……….step into my world and look back out at the odd humans as you join a teenage vampire trying to explain what life is like for a teenage vampire:
Wow, yes, blood. The taste, the feel and the pleasure of it... wowwwwww. (Sorry, getting a bit carried away again.) Humans always think it is disgusting how we can like blood so much knowing where it comes from, well, all I have to say is that they eat eggs knowing where they come from. And as to milk, well it's just perverted to enjoy milk unless you're a baby.
Forget the human movies about bathing in the blood of virgin teenage girls to keep young, it's rubbish - and besides, just where do you find virgin human teenagers now? And, like, are you going to ask them personal questions about their love life before you add them as a bath salt? I think not.
If you would like to know more about my take on the human world you can take a look at my blog http://amymahvampire.blogspot.com/
or better still buy one of my books at……………………  www.fangsrule.com
Amy Mah (Vampire)

Comments

Amy the Vampire said…
i loved this .heheheeheh........... but then again i would ........... AMY
ardeeeichelmann said…
This guest post kicks! Thank you for emphasizing the blood aspect of vampires. REAL vampires need blood not some synthetic among other things.

I don't know where your vampires stand on the angst issue but in my experience, they are heavy into disquietude. I guess some vampires are happy being vampires but not all of them are.

Thanks again for a great guest blog.

Cheers,

Ardee-ann
Orlando said…
Great information on vampires. I always had issue with vampires. I understand they could be stronger than regular humans being dead and alive. However, some of the abilities they have been given lately don't make sense.

I also believe that being more animal than human they would make a huge mess when getting their daily blood supply rather than two small holes to the neck.

Great post, loved the info.